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Tuesday, November 1, 2011

F.A.Q about our homebirth--

Since we had our amazing homebirth in September, I have been hearing lots of questions, so I thought a quick post to answer some of them would be helpful!

1.What were you thinking having a baby at home on purpose?

Evidence shows that homebirths for healthy, low risk women (like myself) are just as safe as hospital births with lower risk of interventions such as pitocin usage and the like.

I really wanted to have a homebirth after my natural hospital birth with Jackson was such a good experience... minus being in a hospital under their roof with their rules. So when we decided to try for baby #3, I told Tim that this would be our homeborn baby if we could help it! :)

2. Did you get the eye goop and shots?

Nope, because it isn't necessary. The eye ointment is a hospital policy, acutally meant to protect baby against sexually transmitted infections- none of which I have... but hospitals don't allow women to opt out of it. They treat all women like they are infected and will infect their babies. I also think it's a load of crap to give newborns any shots, much less one like Hep B... especially since I don't have Hep B.

One of the reasons we chose homebirth was because we are individuals and this is our pregnancy, our baby... I don't want my child being subjected to blanket measures that don't pertain to him at all.

3. What is a doula?

Tequita was my labor support. She is a trained professional (DONA certified), as well as my friend! They provide continuous support before, during, and after your labor. They are a wealth of information- for example, my doula shared with me some resources about natural childbirth that I had not heard of before, she lent me books, I vented to her about my car accident, and we brainstormed ways to get Finn in a good position for labor, she spent hours with me when I was having prodromal labor. During my labor, she provided physical support, which was especially important to me during my labor because of the lower back discomfort caused by Finn being OP with a slight facial presentation (i.e. he was face up instead of face down and instead of his head being tilted down so that his crown emerged first, it was more the front of his head/top of his forehead). Counterpressure is a beautiful, beautiful thing!

4. What did Tim say about all of your "homebirth nonsense?"

Tim believes in homebirth. He believed that I knew what I was asking for when I told him I wanted a homebirth, because I'd educated myself and we made the right decision for our family. Hospitals are for sick people- and I was not sick. Right after Finn was born and I was lying in bed nursing him, Tim announced to the room full of people (two midwives, doula, and birth photographer) that he had no idea why anyone would willingly choose a traditional hospital birth after being present for our homebirth.

Just as a note, I would not have had a homebirth if Tim had not been on board 100%. I believe that if you have a partner, having a supportive spouse is incredibly important to a homebirth. Someone can't be a good support for you if they think you're insane for popping out a baby in your bathtub, you know?

5. What did our family say about the homebirth plans?

There were a few unsupportive people, but the only opinions that mattered were mine and Tim's. Our family, our baby, our decision. Being realistic, the only family that I discussed our birth plans at length with were my mom and my dad ((Hi, Mom and Dad- since I know you read my blog!)), both of whom were super supportive. From what I understand, my father was telling people at church on Sunday that Finn was born en caul in our bathtub! Pretty funny if you know my dad. We knew my mom was crunchy, but my dad being a little crunchy came as a surprise to me, initially. haha :)

6. Aren't you glad you "got lucky" and nothing went wrong?

Actually, MOST things that go wrong during births in this country are a direct result of what we do to laboring women- confining them to beds, external fetal monitoring, inductions, pitocin, epidurals, c-sections... My labor was normal! A normal, healthy birth was expected, but we were prepared in case of emergency. That being said, I do not feel like I got lucky. I gave birth the way nature intended, it was glorious, and I feel like with our state's 32.7% c-section rate, my friends who have ob-gyn managed hospital births and escape relatively unscathed are the lucky ones, not those that have positive outcomes from homebirth.

If something had gone pear shaped, my midwife brought resuscitation equiment and drugs to stop hemorrhage and that kind of thing. The hospital was only an ambulance ride away, in case of emergency. We weren't unprepared. This was not haphazard.

7. Did insurance cover it?

Not a dime, but it was worth every penny! The fees for our birth attendants were less than $3,000... that includes my prenatal care, birth care, and postpartum visits! A serious bargain for the amazing care I received.

8. Did you tear?

No, and my midwife said that I didn't even look (down there) like I'd just given birth, much less given birth to a 9lb. baby that came quickly. Being able to feel the baby move down and not having to push until your face turns purple makes a huge difference, I believe. I was upright for all but the last ten minutes of my labor, 5 of which I laid on my right side, the last 5 I turned over onto my back, then my left side and that's where I was when he was born. Being in a good position (i.e. NOT on my back) during my labor and being able to feel (not getting an epidural) the baby come down and out were of great benefit!

On the other hand, I did develop some 'roids during the last week of my pregnancy because Finn was so heavy and he was so low in my pelvis, it put a lot of pressure on that region. That didn't feel good after birth, but they were totally healed by the time he was about a week old.

9. How is nursing going?

Well! He gained almost 4lbs. in his first 5 weeks :) I'm nursing often, he won't take a paci, and I don't believe in scheduling infants, so we're still night nursing pretty often- which is good for both of us! Cosleeping keeps me from missing too much sleep.

10. Were you scared?

Honestly, not a bit! I felt very prepared and even though it was a fast and intense birth, I felt calm and collected.

11. Did you eat and drink during labor?

Nothing but water, but bear in mind my labor was less than 2 and a half hours long (and there was no down time- it was transitional labor), so had it been longer, I would have made it a point to fuel my body.

Immediately after, I had some juice, a fruit smoothie, and two sliced kiwi :)

12. Did you meditate and breathe between contractions?

Nope, I made the bed, put dirty clothes in the hamper... yes, I cleaned my house during seconds long breaks between contractions in transitional labor. Couldn't stand to be still.

After my doula and photographer got there, I just enjoyed Tequita and Kate when I wasn't breathing through a contraction.

13. Are you having another one?

No, 3 kids is it for us, but if I were planning to have more children, I would plan homebirths. :)

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Fall happenings, so far!

We've been all over the place here lately, but I'm trying to get back into the habit of blogging!

Finn looking super chunky in his flannel plaid!

We were on our way to a local farm day.

Jackson insisted on bringing Lightening McQueen.

*sigh*

Super windy, but Finn was happy in the Sleepy Wrap!

Jackson loved the Alpacas!

Cute sign :)

Jackson didn't particularly enjoy the music...

Taking a break from the fun to nurse in the car, out of the wind!

He didn't appreciate me delaying his nursing to take his photo.

Keelin and her classmates sang at a PTA meeting!

Dress was to be a white top and black bottom.

To spice it up, we hooked her up with sparkly black shoes and a cow print headband!

;)

She had a great time!

We're so proud of her!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

5 weeks postpartum

Now that our beautiful boy is here and I'm feeling back to normal, minus a bit of sleep loss, it's time to get back into my jeans. My maternity pants are HUGE on me now and I only have a couple of pairs of jeans that are larger than my usual size.

Gotta love the post-baby Mommy squish!

Hopefully, we shall see some improvement soon!

Pictures are to keep me motivated!

No more babies for this Mommy, so it will be nice to get back into my clothes and not worry about reclaiming my body again!

Friday, October 7, 2011

Finn's Birth!

Those that know me personally know I'm not shy.

This birth story is detailed and somewhat graphic in nature- obviously.

Some of the photos are, as well.

Disclaimer made!

;)

Now for the good part!

The night of September 2nd, Tim and I got Jackson in bed (Keelin was at the beach with her dad's family), then decided to settle down in the living room and watch a movie. He got bored with the romantic comedy and went to bed. I'd been having inconsistent, relatively painless contractions on and off throughout the day.

It seems like right after the movie was over, I started feeling the need to time the contractions, because they had gone from being random to being pretty close together and uncomfortable... uncomfortable to the point where I couldn't lay down or sit down.

My contractions had gone from being 12 minutes apart, 9 minutes apart, 25 minutes apart to TWO minutes apart and consistently so. I was a bit shocked and just not sure that this was Go Time. It's like I went from 0 to 60 instantly... couldn't possibly be the real deal, right?

I labored on my yoga ball for a few minutes, timing contractions on my laptop, and decided pretty quickly that I was going to want some help coping. They were coming quickly, they were strong, and I had a great birth team. It was time to make phone calls... no need to hang out on my own.

First, I called my doula, Tequita. Then, I called my friend and birth photographer, Kate. They got here about the same time. I woke Tim between the two phone calls.

At this point, I hadn't been in labor for very long - I labored with Jackson, my first unmedicated delivery, for 13 hours, so I just knew Finn would take a while. I called Kate because I wanted photos no matter what- this was going to be my last birth and I have no pictures of my first two births. I called Tequita because I wanted her ninja doula skills- I was having "back labor"... which we predicted, because no matter how many times I saw my chiropractor, no matter how many exercises I did- Finn was "OP"/occiput posterior and I expected the back labor... this was probably the cause of my 3 weeks of prodromal labor.

(I called Kate and Tequita around 2am.)

Tequita and Kate were here!

Kate wanted to take one last picture of my belly, but in the mere seconds between my contractions, I wanted to show Tequita the cute, cotton bralette I'd picked out to wear in the birth tub- the birth tub that at this point, Tim was busy trying to fill.

Tequita recognized how hard and fast my contractions were coming. She helped me cope through a few, applying counterpressure -the only thing that relieved the ache in my lower back during the contractions.

When she asked if I'd called D, my midwife, I realized that no, I hadn't- and we needed to. Things were moving much faster than I'd anticipated and she lived 40 minutes away.

We called D at 2:40am.

I started timing my contractions at 1:25am.

At this point, I'd been in labor for just under two hours.

My contractions were on top of each other. There was no more than 20-30 seconds between them.

I decided to take a shower, since water is so soothing when you're in labor!

I checked my cervix in the shower and I was almost complete.

There was a bit of an anterior lip left to my cervix and his head was RIGHT there.

Surprise!

I got out and went to Tequita- my back was really aching and there was no break between the contractions at this point. She got on the phone with D, gave her an update, while D was on her way to our house.

I was wrapped in Keelin's goldfish beach towel- the first one I could get my hands on. :)

You know you like my cool towel...

I told Tim that there wasn't time to finish filling the birth tub.

The Aquadoula, our rented birth tub, was HUGE- and I'm sure glorious when in use!

But I wasn't going to be able to use it.

My labor went so quickly that, by the time I knew the baby was coming SOON, there was only about 3 inches of water in the tub.

Bear in mind, Tim had not even been up an hour at this point!

But still- I wanted to give birth in the water. I asked Tim to start heating water on the stove, since there was very little hot water left in our smallish hot water heater from my shower and the birth pool filling.

I got into the bathtub as soon as it was about halfway filled. I felt like I couldn't wait for the relief the water would bring... and as soon as I got in, I felt much better.

Tequita, still on the phone with my midwife (who was on her way), listened to me muse that there was not much of a chance, I imagined, that D was going to make it in time for the baby to be born. She smiled at me, because it was a no brainer to her. I, on the other hand, had one foot in the real world and one foot in Labor Land- there were moments about which I remember everything and moments when I remember nothing...moments where I felt like I made perfect sense and moments where I'm sure I sounded crazy. I was genuinely surprised that D wasn't going to make it. I was so far inside of myself that I hadn't given much more than a spare thought to the idea that I might have an unassisted delivery... when the midwife doesn't make it in time.

I realized that I was going to give birth without my midwife.

No fear, no panic- just "okay."

I wasn't scared. My body was doing exactly what needed to be done- and boy, was it efficient!

I had a contraction, felt a strange sensation, and said, "Either my water just broke or I peed."

I thought about peeing in the bathtub after telling the kids they aren't allowed to do it...

It was 3:05 when I started to feel a lot of pressure.

Tim was still warming up my bath water with water from the stovetop (bless him!) when I called him and told him that I needed him in the bathroom- that we were having a baby SOON.

Before I started feeling pushy, I had been lying in the tub using a small bowl to pour warm water over my belly. I had a good 5 minutes of no contractions. It was blissful and really gave me time to regain some control over my thoughts, to prepare to give birth. I really needed that time, because my labor had been so intense. It was a gift. It was a literal and figurative catching of my breath, so to speak. Up until this point, I had not really had the chance to compose myself, to get a good pattern going. There just wasn't the time.

I really felt the urge to push, but I wanted to breathe my baby out, letting my body do the work. I tore terribly with Keelin with coached pushing and the epidural, so the recovery was a doozy. I did not tear with Jackson, thanks to being able to control my pushes. I was hoping that this birth would be gentle, as well.

Not a pretty face, but unless you've FELT it, you can't imagine how overwhelming the urge to push is. It doesn't hurt, but it's a consuming feeling- you don't have control over your body. That baby is coming out with or without your help.

I felt like I needed to go ahead and get off of my back.

The most comfortable position when I labored with Jackson was on my left side, so I tried to roll over a bit. I'm sure it was like watching a hippo do a waltz. :)

3:11am.

I was trying to get comfortable, which at this point was impossible.

I could feel Finn moving down.

More like barreling down, really.

I wasn't pushing.

Doulas don't catch babies.

Kate, even though she is a nurse, was not to get involved unless there was an emergency, and everything was progressing normally.

So, Tim prepared to catch.

BUT he kept his hands off of me in the meantime.

I know that I am not touchy-feely in my day to day life... and that is magnified 100 times when I'm in labor. Don't touch me unless I ask you to- and I will ask if I need someone to touch me.

I was SURE I was feeling him crown, so I reached down to feel something pop out out. I realized that earlier when I thought my water might have broken, I really had peed in the bath tub. (haha)

What emerged was amniotic sac- intact and strong. Pretty cool, since my waters had remained intact when I labored with Jackson until he was crowning. At the time, I didn't think much of it because I was kinda busy, but now I look back and think it's awesome!

I remember my disappointment at him not having crowned yet. My labor had been moving so fast and I just wanted relief from the pressure, but in my mind, things had slowed down to almost a standstill. When our baby actually did crown (or in our case, forehead... haha), it was less than a minute before he was born, according to the watch shots that Kate took.

I reached down and felt his head emerging, supporting my perineum- all the while not pushing, just letting my body do it's thing. As some people know, I have a mouth when I find myself in stressful situations. When that child's head just kept coming and coming and coming... like the never-ending GIGANTIC head that I imagined it to be... I spat out some explicatives, Tim being their target, since this part was pretty uncomfortable with his forehead presenting, not his crown. I made an off-color comment about his "big head," but I believe that was the only time during my labor and delivery that I got snappy. ;)

And Finn's head was out. I reached down and happened to touch his face (because he was facing UP! He never did turn) and in doing so, tore my amniotic sac. The first and only time I pushed during Finn's birth was here. I was ready to meet him, so I gave a push and told Tim he needed to get him- from the way I was lying in the tub, I couldn't really reach for him myself. I remember that push and feeling his arm with my hand as he was born.

And he was out.

My midwife, still on the phone with Tequita, told me that she heard us welcome our new baby at 3:13am.

Tim says that he put on his "sticky gloves" to catch!

Finn Cohen Power

Born on September 3rd, 2011 at 3:13am

And yes, I decided that this was one photo I wanted to share, but that sharing it unedited would be a bit of overshare. You're welcome :)

Tim helped me sit up and handed Finn to me.

I could not believe how big he felt in my arms!

I commented on the size of his head when I was laboring, but couldn't really fathom his length or weight in these moments after his birth.

I had just given birth.

At HOME!

And it was AMAZING.

I had some skin to skin time with my little one.

We left his cord alone.

We wanted to delay cutting it until after I had delivered the placenta.

Yes, I was darn proud!!

I know the water looks quite dark in the black and white photos, but in reality, I lost very little blood. The water had a dark pinkish tint, because a little bit of blood goes a long way in the water.

I didn't tear at all, either.

(And I'm a month postpartum, no longer experiencing any postpartum bleeding!)

YAY!

My post-birth spread.

Apple juice, a fruit smoothie, and a bottle of Smart Water!

I was certainly not at risk for dehydration

Shortly after Finn's birth, D arrived!

She congratulated us and checked out the baby, who was doing just fine.

About 50 minutes after he was born, I pushed once and delivered the placenta.

No tugging, no premature cutting of the cord.

No one took my baby out of my arms, like could have happened in a hospital.

Tim cut the cord and they took the placenta away to examine it after I got a good look at it! So very cool!

(By the way, I will be doing a placenta post later...)

With Keelin and Jackson's births, I never had the opportunity to watch the cords being cut, to check out my placentas... and both of them were taken from me immediately for newborn exams and such.

This was such a peaceful, quiet, and respectable time.

My body, my space, and my new baby were top priority...

as it should always be.

After the cord was cut, Tim took Finn to our bedroom to hang out while I got out of the tub and cleaned up. Tequita went with him.

I loved seeing these pictures, since I wasn't in the room at the time.

I got out of the tub and went into our master bathroom. I took a nice, hot shower (it felt awesome!) and relaxed for a few minutes, then I got dressed and got into bed with my new baby.

He latched on well and nursed like a champion!

It was so nice to be home in my own bed, instead of in a hard hospital bed. I went from watching a movie to laboring, giving birth in a warm bathtub, taking a nice shower, and then crawling into my bed to nurse my baby without machines, drugs, or routines.

I got to lie in bed nursing my baby for a while, as I discussed my incredible birth with D, R, Tequita, Kate, and Tim! After we'd had a chance to catch up, I told D that I was dying to weigh Finn! I was trying to be all cool about it, but I couldn't wait any longer.