Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Negativity (edit number 6)

Today, I let someone's bitterness and negativity affect me. I normally can vent, get it out, and move on, but what this person said to me actually made me angry.

That being said, I'm a very emotional person. I vent to my close friends and my husband, then I feel better. I process out loud. I'm not big on crying, because it usually never gets to that point. I very nearly went off on someone for being disrespectful and hateful regarding something I am very passionate about. But I didn't. I shut my mouth, turned off my computer, and went to bed.

I learned something tonight.

I am the only one who has a hand on my happiness. I choose to be happy. People don't make me happy, my circumstances don't make me happy. I am happy because I choose to be.

Some days, it is hard to remember that I am happy. I let the noise, the pollution, the funk into my head and it's hard to drive it out. That's what happened today. I let someone else's ageism and ignorance get past my filter. I let it in. That was my mistake.

BUT I am a wise 23, almost 24 year old. I know that what this person said had NOTHING to do with me. This person projected their issues onto me, disregarding my education on the subject, ignoring the wisdom of a younger person, refusing to recognize an educated opinion supported by science because it did not mesh with what the media has taught said person.

I did some yoga, controlled my breathing, and recentered myself- sans the funk.

Update: I've since seen this person and didn't even feel uncomfortable around them. People only influence you if you let them, so I encourage you to be firm in what you believe, filter out the noise, and don't ever let anyone undermine your passions and convictions.

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